Sunday, January 26, 2014

A post with nothing to do about art but an insight I felt like sharing.

I woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. At least, I thought I had earlier today. I chalked it up to PMS or something but I just wasn't in the mood for much of anything today. But, I did what I had to do and I went to church. I won't get into details but I left a lot crankier than when I arrived so I went to the gym to blow off some steam. Well, after looking at myself in the mirror I stayed in my cranky state. (lets just say I gained some weight this past year and am doing something about it this year). While I was changing to go home in the locker room, It finally crossed my mind that maybe I was just hungry. Sometimes (not all the time) I tend to get very cranky when I haven't eaten so I went home and made myself a very delicious and LARGE spinach salad. Gosh it was good and I devoured it. Yup, It was because I hadn't eaten. I felt like the fog and low hanging clouds of Whitefish had lifted and flowers would spring forth from the heaps of icey snow-mounds. I guess that is the problem when you live alone...no one to tell you what you already know and encourage you to chillax and eat something. When I lived in Missoula and had my family around they'd often tell me that. When I was dating a certain someone, he'd often asked if I needed a piece of cheese (I LOVE cheese). That was always the cue that I was cranky because I needed to eat something. Funny how somedays I can go without eating because I'm so busy and I don't even notice and I'm still my normal opptimistic perky self. Thank heavens it doesn't happen very often.

After practically inhailing my salad I figured I should work on my epic painting. I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOO close to finishing but after standing at the table and stairing at it for a good 10 minutes, I didn't feel like it. I just wanted to curl up in a blanket with some bed buddies (sewed bags with rice that you heat up in the microwave) and either watch a movie, take a sunday afternoon nap or read a book. I figured I'd better read. It's kinda funny to say, but I feel SO adult in 2014....I'm part of a book club. We are reading A Long Way Down by Nick Hornby. Our meeting is next Friday and I'm 1/2 way through the book and this week is going to be busy so reading won.

I ended up finishing the book. It was good and I mostly enjoyed it, even though it was dark. It's about 4 people who meet each other for the first time on a rooftop where they were planning on committing suicide and they then take the long way day instead of the quick one. There were some very thought provoking lines that some of the characters would say that would get me thinking about how I react, interact, and view things in my own life. But it sure had the word F*** in it a lot. I do swear more than I ought. Usually when I'm upset about something but geesh, the excessive use of the F bomb really began to irritate me. After I finished the book, I was relieved. Relieved about the characters journeys and the insights they gained but most relieved I didn't have to endure that language.

While I was reading I got a hankering for chocolate. Chocolate always makes me feel better. I had started feeling cranky again, So, I found a box of cookies I bought at Target at the after Christmas sale (got them for a $1, Woot Woot) that I hid away for a rainy day and ate 10 of them. I know, I know. If I want to loose weight I can't be eating 10 cookies that are full of high fructose corn syrup, color additives, more sugars, 'natural flavors', and more ingredients than there should be listed for a simple cookie. But I did.

My realization that maybe it wasn't PMS, waking up on the wrong side of the bed, or forgetting to eat that made be so cranky. Maybe it was the language and depressing themes in the book that affected me so. I guess I'm a lot more sensitive than I thought. The book is good and I'm glad about the insights I gained but I just want to warn you, make sure you have a box of cookies or someone to lift you up if you read it. You may need it.

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